the joys of moon jogging!

i am a new person! i finally had it tonite with the lack of energy and such and at 11:20pm or so decided to go for a jog. Best idea i've had in a reaally long time! It was amazing! Ran my toushie off (prolly the wrong spelling, right? but doesn't it look cute/french?) and came back a new person. After a nice, cooling shower i was ready to dip my freshly oxygenized brain into some more biochem... and oh, wasn't that a joy!

i must say, jogging at midnite needs to become a hobby! it just might be the answer to all the past ramblings. In a way it's kinda sad that the answer to all those 'life shattering' questions was just lack of exercise. its not even exercise, its physically tiring your body, putting some stress onto it so as to get it in gear! The even sadder part is that i knew all along that this is what is gonna get me outta my hole, but i.... i was too lazy? too tired? i dunno.. good thing i finally reached my laziness/tiredness limit and got back on the horse.

haha... this is the first nite i'm doing this. maybe i shouldn't praise myself that much and then not do it again! haha... in a week i'd still be patting myself on the back: "good job Cris for jogging that one nite! that was phenomenal!" yeah, so let's not overdo it with the congratulatory celebrations yet!

i had the awesomest lab meeting today! i'm loving my professor and all the people in the lab! i'm so happy and grateful to whomever planned and is planning the scheme of things, for putting me in this lab, because i couldn't have chosen a better group of people. i was reading in the Alchemist about that whole 'follow your heart' motif, and how the situation is always easy at first (kind of like the begginers luck) but then you really prove yourself if you stick to it when shit gets tough! well, this is kinda how i see this research thing going for me. It is all smiles and easy stuff now - great people, no worries, no deadlines. but will i be able to handle the real stuff? am i dedicated, organized enough for this kind of career? i truly admire my professor, i think he is a very equilibrated (ha, e clar ca vreau sa spun echilibrat! cateodata nu-mi iese transformarea dintr-o limba in alta) man, i feel that he is happy and content with what he is doing, that he is fully enjoying where he is right now. Mainly, i admire him because happy people like that are hard to find. I want to get there... thats my goal! there i said it... ha! to be happy. wow, thats a mindblower! duuh, woman!

the thing is i'm not sure how specific my direction is supposed to be.... let me try to explain that. i think that in order to be happy at this point i need to have a direction, to know where i want to get so that i'll know what to work on now (how to perfect myself for that goal). let's say research is my goal... does that mean that i should go for a phD and research in a university? or look for opportunities in the industry? should i focus on more of a business approach to it? (and actually listen from time to time to what eugene and his ceo ideas have to say?) but most importantly - is it worth worrying about all this shit now? am i making too big of a deal or are these justified questions?

now that i have somewhat of a audience - please feel free to comment on the situation if you feel compelled...i've always enjoyed a good shake to bring me back to reality! gets the blood rushing! ;)

okay... maybe i should try some sleep now

aah, so fresh and so clean!

C dog